"Love is moral even without legal marriage, but marriage is immoral without love." - Ellen Key

"Love is moral even without legal marriage, but marriage is immoral without love." - Ellen Key

 

Ellen Key, a renowned Swedish feminist writer, expressed this quotation, emphasizing the significance of love in the context of relationships between individuals, particularly within and outside the institution of marriage. The quote underscores the moral and ethical dimensions of these relationships. Society often considers the legal aspect of relationships as the basis for their morality, even if they may actually be immoral. Conversely, relationships that may not conform to legal standards can still possess moral values. Ellen Key's message conveys that love is the fundamental element in relationships between men and women. When love is present, the relationship is moral, regardless of its legal status. Conversely, any relationship, even a legally recognized marriage, devoid of love, is immoral.

One of the supporting arguments for this viewpoint stems from nature. All living beings, whether animals or humans, desire love for themselves. Relationships founded on love, whether among animals, humans, or even between humans and animals, are stronger than those based on coercion or force, which may be legal but lack the power of love. This argument suggests that all creatures naturally seek love, and any relationship rooted in love is moral because it fulfills their psychological and innate need for love. Jeremy Bentham, a notable English political philosopher, stated in his theory of utilitarianism that "Nature has placed mankind under the governance of two sovereign masters: pleasure and pain." Essentially, humans naturally seek pleasure, which encompasses the satisfaction of their basic needs, including love, care, emotions, and expectations. Therefore, any action that fulfills a person's natural needs is natural, and what is natural is moral.

Psychology also provides another argument in support of this stance. Every living being feels at ease with those they love. Legal relationships, such as marriage, cannot provide the same level of comfort as relationships built on love, care, and understanding. While legal marriage is a contractual arrangement, its purpose lies in fulfilling psychological needs rather than solely legal obligations. These psychological needs can only be met through love, care, and understanding. Hence, when love, care, and understanding exist between two individuals who are not in a legal relationship, it is still moral because it fulfills their psychological needs. Conversely, a relationship based on a legal contract but devoid of love, care, and understanding is immoral since it fails to fulfill the psychological needs of those involved.

Furthermore, socio-legal relationships can be examined through a similar lens. Social bonds rely on mutual understanding rather than legal contracts. These mutual understandings and social agreements cannot be legally contested since they lack binding force in the eyes of the law. For instance, a woman cannot sue her husband for not loving her, nor can a husband sue his wife for lacking affectionate communication. These issues are matters of social understanding, love, care, and comprehension—matters of morality rather than law. Thus, when it pertains solely to morality and not legality, it is moral to love without marriage and immoral to marry without love.

In conclusion, Ellen Key astutely noted that love possesses inherent morality even in the absence of legal marriage, while a marriage devoid of love is immoral. Her perspective is supported by natural philosophy, psychological philosophy, and socio-legal philosophy. Any relationship based on love, care, and mutual understanding is moral, ethical, and just. Conversely, any relationship lacking love, care, and mutual understanding is immoral, even if it adheres to a legal contract. Ultimately, the morality of a relationship is determined by the presence or absence of love, not by legal parameters. Hence, it is justifiable to love without legal marriage, while marrying without love is entirely unjust.


Kamran Khan advocate

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